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I thought this appropriate, considering my companionship:
The Cats’ Bill Of Rights
1. Humans shall make no law respecting an establishment of
boundaries or prohibiting the free exercise therein, or
abridging the freedom of access, or the right to peaceful
assembly. In other words: The cat is entitled to go outside
anytime s/he wants.
2. A well-carried provisional chamber, being necessary to the
fulfillment of a feline’s whims, shall not be infringed. In
other words: The cat is entitled to EAT anytime s/he wants.
3. The right of the feline to be secure in their domain, and
effects, against unreasonable discomposure, shall not be
violated. In other words: The cat is entitled to SLEEP anytime
4. Humans shall issue no warrants or decrees or edicts as
prescribed to the demarcation of possessions or property which
are in direct conflict with right of life, liberty, and the
pursuit of feline affirmation. In other words: The cat is
entitled to sleep ANYWHERE s/he wants.
5. The feline shall be immune to all criminal accusations,
indictments, and complaints. The accused shall enjoy the right
to a speedy and impartial dismissal of any and all charges
provided said feline’s compulsory right to obtain any or all
witnesses, including character witnesses, are obtained in his
favor. In other words: Cats can do anything they want as long
as they’re cute.
6. Neither serfdom, vassalage, or involuntary servitude will be
tolerated, except by said cats in proprietorship of their humans.
In other words: What I say goes. (And I can sleep on your face.)
7. No Canis familiaris shall, in time of peace or at any other
time, be quartered in any dwelling without the consent of the
potentate, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed
by sovereign. In other words: No dogs in the house without my
8. The right of the feline to be protected against unreasonable
search and seizures shall not be breached or infringed upon at
any time or any place. In other words: Don’t disturb me when I
am sleeping in a drawer.